It's funny how I attend art school, and I use this thing mostly to write.
mostly because I know none of my peers see it.
mostly because I know almost no one sees it.
but that's fine. it's a good outlet for shameless self pity I guess.

I'm moving in all directions, and thus nowhere at all. It was my first day back to class, and I broke up with Nate. Rather, he broke up with me, but I knew it was coming- kind of the same thing,I guess.
The actual severing part was fairly alright- nothing dramatic, nothing unforeseen. It just wasn't working for him anymore, he either needs to be serious- which neither of us were really looking for- or just friends. That grey area is where he does he rockstar cheating bullshit, so we agreed, "fuck that."

We agreed that we wanted to be friends, still hang out. My primary sadness is in this: that this is nothing more than an empty, comforting promise. That I'm not really good for conversation or chemistry.The conversation and company was really the best part, anyway. The lovey dovey bullshit is nice, but you kind of need the interest for that to feel legitimate.

this, plus going back to class, have been a bit brutal to my self esteem. My artwork is average, especially this assignment. The sketch looks like a silly high school assignment.

I'm not anything special in particular. Not especially talented, pretty, or interesting.
I wonder how I got this far.

Tomorrow will be spent trying to figure out how to be distinctive in so many ways.
I have no idea what I'm after.